So Come on Down to Erudite Expressions and Get Yourself a Print. Or Don’t.

Hi, I am Eugene. I own Erudite Expressions. I sell prints.

I’m not gonna waste your time; I’m gonna tell it just like it is.

These are prints, not works of art. They come unframed. If that’s what you’re looking for, that’s what I got.

They’re new. None of them have stains. I post-process the images, these guys print ’em, and these guys help me deliver ’em. [Insert cat screech here].

A bouncer in Birmingham told me that he wouldn’t frame my prints even if I gave them away for free. And my best friend told me that he didn’t even know that I sold prints.

So if you don’t buy a print from me, it ain’t gonna hurt my feelings.

So come on down to Erudite Expressions and get yourself a print. Or don’t. I don’t care…

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In case you are confused, the above text is based on this awesome commercial of an honest man selling mobile homes in Alabama: